Becoming Virtuous

Another revolution around the sun complete. It was a year filled with highs and lows. But sitting here at the end of it, I am so thankful for God’s grace that carried me through, and for the awesome people I get to do life with.

Now, per usual, some random life lessons from the year.

• Where my greatest weaknesses are, and I feel most unlovable, that is where I can know and see that God puts an exclamation point on His love for me. He made me with the strengths and weaknesses I have, and He loves me in those.
• Don’t be too quick to diagnose and treat problems. Patiently observe. Taking time to dig through the emotions and figure things out is okay and can help reveal root issues that might otherwise have been missed. Then slowly work to reshape the conversations in my head.
• When overwhelmed, think through what is one small practical step I can take to make a little progress forward (raise by one).
• There is general identity in Christ, where I am saved and a child of God. And there is also specific identity, where God has uniquely gifted me. I can live in His love for me by recognizing and walking in those unique giftings.
• Does my self-talk line up with 1 Corinthians 13? Is it patient, is it kind?
• Sanity is worth something.
• Don’t take other people’s monkeys. Banish monkeys.
• Call out and name the strengths I see in others. They probably don’t realize it’s something they’re uniquely gifted at.
• Commitment -> Courage -> Capability -> Confidence
• Negative soundtracks won’t just disappear. They need to be intentionally replaced with good soundtracks, and that replacement process will take time.
• Times of heresy and error in the church have caused the true church to mine the depths of Scripture and come out with a fuller picture of Who God is.
• God doesn’t give us trials so that we can have a minimal heat signal in the battle. He calls us to not shrink back (Hebrews) and instead press on (Philippians).
• Stand up and speak for those who are being persecuted, protect those who can’t protect themselves, seek justice.
• Make yourself do one new hard thing every day.
• You need people around you who can help you know if you need to rest, or need to push through and not leave an opportunity on the table
• You can walk alongside people as they grow, but you really can’t make people change
• When going through suffering, likely won’t have capacity to reflect on and excavate it. In those moments, focus on Lam. 3:22–23.
• Hardening your heart and cutting yourself off in one relationship causes a ripple effect in all other relationships; with God, family, friends. Instead, need to be open 
• Hebrews 11:6, if I want to draw near to God, I need to believe that He exists, and that He rewards those who seek Him
• In the wilderness seasons, preach truth to myself, and hold onto the belief that seeking God’s presence is worth it
• I need to see my intense need for Jesus, and cry out to Him
• You can either grow here, grow somewhere else, or maintain the status quo, and only one of those sounds like a bad option
• Bad news doesn’t get better with time. Face it, grow, and move on.
• Don’t follow the lights. (LotR reference.) Wallowing in self pity is a nasty place to live. But the thing is, you can choose your thoughts, and that’s a powerful antidote.
• It’s never too late to get back on track. All it takes is the mindset and the willingness and grit to do what needs to be done.
• “There are two pains in life. The pain of discipline and the pain of regret. You choose which one.” – Josiah (power lifter)
• “If everyone in your life agrees with you 100% of the time, you’re actually not in relationship with anyone but yourself. And you’ve created an atmosphere where people know it’s not safe to say what they really think.” – Mike Donehey
• Hold on to my opinions loosely.
• Be quick to resolve conflict and discuss potential misunderstandings